I'm A Patsy - Gotta Problem With That?

Saturday, August 28, 2010

“Lone Star” – new Fox show starting Monday, September 20, 9pm to 10pm

This story begins with the father, David Keith, tossing his young son, Bobby, out a window to go start the car while he’s right behind him. The law is knocking at their door as they are brilliant con artists who are about to be apprehended. But evidently not as the story continues with Bobby all grown up and a super, brilliant con artist on his own who can’t seem to lose his dad. Bobby is smart, empathetic, sweet, knowledgeable and very good-looking in a sort of puppy-dog way. After watching this episode, I was ready to write him a check until I realized this was all make-believe!

This all takes place in Texas where women are women and men are conniving, corrupt and immoral. Bobby, now Bob, has two wives – one in Midland Texas and one in Huston. The one in Midland is sweet, naïve and very unworldly. The one in Huston is beautiful, not the least bit naïve and certainly not unworldly. Bob goes on his way, sweet-talking nice people out of their money for some make-believe oil well or minerals until the Huston father-in-law, Jon Voight, who actually owns oil wells and is very powerful, takes note of him and puts him in his business on the 30th floor yet! Bob’s dad thinks it’s a way in to get all the money, but Bob wants to go straight after years of the con game. So that doesn’t go over well, and what’s more, Jon Voight is a real son-of-a-bitch which does not bode too well for Bob. Bob’s dad always told him, “You play any character you want but you never play yourself.” This is the con’s man creed, and Bob crossed the line falling in love with a mark, let alone two.

This could turn out to be a very entertaining show – sort of like “Dallas” on crack. It’s going to be fun seeing how Bob manages two wives, a mean dad, and a meaner boss and father in law. This probably calls for a mental breakdown someplace down the road.
We’ll see. Just keep watching.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

“Raising Hope” – new fall Fox show beginning Tuesday, September 21

I just watched the pilot episode, and I found it hilarious! I get all engrossed in dramas which I also love, but shows like “Raising Hope” is just crazy funny and makes me laugh out loud. As the story goes, Jimmy is 23 and still lives at home with his folks and his MAW MAW, great grandma played by Cloris Leachman who runs around with just a bra on top. She thinks Jimmy’s her husband which makes for some uncomfortable moments for Jimmy. Martha Plimpton plays his mother, and I like her in this part more than I have in other parts she has played. It starts with Jimmy quitting his pool cleaning job, and he tells his mom as she’s going to the van with “Knock, Knock, Knock, Housecleaning” painted on the side. That’s where she works. He says, “There’s gotta be more to life than cleaning the same pool over and over again.” Mom says, “There isn’t” and jumps in the van.

As time goes on, Jimmy has a very, very brief encounter with a girl who turns out to become pregnant and somehow or other he turns out to be the one who has to take care of the baby girl. The mother is very much out of the picture as it becomes clear during the show. He knows nothing about raising a kid and neither do his folks as they were married at 15 and didn’t learn much when they had Jimmy. The mother has a cigarette in her mouth all the time until Jimmy tells her it will hurt the baby, and she says “It didn’t hurt you.” They also tell him he could drop it off at the fire station but he would have to hand it off, not throw it in the barrel which is just for canned goods and puppies. But Jimmy wants to keep her. The baby’s mom named her Princess Beyonce. No one is very wild about that name. As time goes on, he acquires things for the baby, and he goes to the grocery store where there is a cute, quirky clerk who asks about the baby seat he has. He said he got it used, and she says, “Who used it – baby Jesus?” That girl shows promise and may be the smartest one of the whole bunch.

There are many funny scenes and lines in this show. I like it and hope it makes it. Jimmy’s mom decides the baby should be named “Hope” and that’s that. You wonder if there are really people that lame among us, and I think there are – too many probably. In fact, I think that’s where the Tea Party started. But I think there’s hope for this family now that they have a little baby living with them. And maybe they can get Cloris Leachman to keep her shirt on! However, she’s pretty funny no matter what she is or isn’t wearing.

Monday, August 23, 2010


Celebration!!

Teri, Mark and Harry came back from their trip with Rita’s family to Sun River and stayed one night with me before leaving for New York and then Greece - - a country with a worse economy than ours! We had to celebrate, so I bought a nice wine, not the cheap stuff that I drink. I got out my three wine glasses and Harry’s sippy cup. I keep it with all my wine glasses in the wine cupboard where it belongs. I used to have four big wine glasses in case I had a couple over visiting me and my boyfriend. But I didn’t have a boyfriend until I found one in Louisiana. He called me his fiancé and I called him my friend. I was planning a trip to see him to see if maybe he could be a fiancé, but then Katrina happened. I had to cancel my plane ticket and also my friend. He married someone who apparently liked living in that hot, sweaty climate, so I broke one of my wine glasses. I’m in no hurry to get another one.

Getting back to the celebration . . . the last time Harry was here which wasn’t that long ago, I offered the sippy cup to him and he said he wasn’t using it anymore. He’s almost 15, but that’s no excuse for giving it up. I’ll bet he uses it at home when he gets up in the morning to get himself started with a warm shot of milk. I remember when they were in Los Angeles and living in West Hollywood in a really fun neighborhood. Teri and I would get up early and walk down the street to the corner for coffee and tabloids in our pajamas! Those were fun times there. But before we were up, Harry would stumble into my room, throw himself down on the bean bag chair and wait for Teri to bring him warm milk in this sippy cup. He’d drink it really fast and then fling it clear across the room!! I’ll bet he still does that – he just doesn’t let me see him. I miss those days when they lived there. Teri and I would see stars on the streets there all the time and they looked just as crappy as we did. Teri always noticed them and would have to tell me. I am extremely unobservant. But it was exciting. Getting back to our celebration, we three big people each had a glass of wine and Harry had orange juice in a real glass, not the sippy cup. But I’m still keeping it just in case. I know one day I’ll catch him drinking out of it, and I’ll have my camera ready!

I, of course, gave them my expert advice on traveling to foreign countries. Don’t keep your wallet in your back pocket and don’t sit on the toilets – just crouch over them. I couldn’t think of anything else off the top of my head as I’m not a traveler. They are all pretty fit so could probably fend off a mugger – at least I’m hoping that’s true. Teri is very fit and I’m sure could be as resourceful as the woman who injured her boyfriend when she struck him several times with a vacuum cleaner! Why a vacuum cleaner? Why not a vacuum cleaner? Police found him all bloody and unconscious, so she really did a number on him. Teri could do that but I doubt she took a vacuum cleaner with her. I don’t even know if she has one. I’m sure they’ll be ok and have lots of fun.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010


Out to Dinner

Teri, Mark and Harry came into town on Thursday night and I had a big dinner all ready for them. I made chicken divan and a big salad which I told them I had worked all day putting together. Actually, the salad was in a sack that you just dumped out and put on the salad dressing and croutons that were also in the package. Teri thought Harry would like the divan, but he didn’t because of the broccoli, so he had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He was upset that I hadn’t made chocolate cookies and whipped cream for him like I usually do . . . but hey! Give grandma a break. He’s lucky he got the PB&J. Rita and her kids and other kids - - they have other people’s kids all over the place at their house which is usual with teenagers - - came over and Harry was so excited to see his wife, Reggie. He went back to their house for the night with all the other teenagers - - they may have even picked up some more on their way home.

The next day Teri and Mark went out looking around the town. They didn’t do the breastfeeding thing that I wrote about that was going on that day. Teri just wasn’t that interested - - I think it was sort of “been there, done that.” Mark would have liked to go, but Teri put her foot down. So they bought a few things and also got some chocolate cookies for me. When they came home, I made chocolate cookies and whipped cream for Harry.

That night both families went out to dinner. The above picture has all the kids in it. From the left is Hayden, Rita and Steve’s boy who’s going to OSU this fall. Sorry about the cut-off head, Hayden. Next to Hayden is Summer, his girlfriend. Then there’s Leah who I’m sure is someone’s girlfriend but I didn’t find out. Then there’s Reggie, Rita and Steve’s daughter who is Harry’s wife. Harry is on the end. I don’t know if their marriage will be a smooth one when and if it happens. Time will tell. When dinner was over, Harry, of course, wanted to go back to Rita’s where all the kids were hanging out. But Mark and Teri insisted he come back with us for bonding time with his grandma! That wasn’t that interesting the least little bit until I mentioned I had his favorite dessert! So we came home and Teri went to bed on the air mattress in my computer room. Harry ate nearly all of the chocolate cookies and whipped cream and Mark, Harry and I settled down to watch David Letterman. We then watched Craig Ferguson which I love as does Harry. After that Harry was asleep. So Mark dragged him into the bedroom, put him on the bed and Mark apparently slept on the floor!

The next day they left for SunRiver and will be back here Friday. They’ll leave for New York on Saturday. I’m sure I’ll have lots more clothes to wash before they leave the next day. But I like washing clothes. I’m so glad I don’t have to go down to the river and scrub them on a rock. But I’m really glad I don’t have to wear a burqa with just my eyes peeking out. How would I keep dark glasses on then? And it would be so hot.

I seem to have drifted away from the family visit topic. I guess that was enough family stuff. Too much family stuff can give you a headache!

Sunday, August 01, 2010


Back to the compound

Teri and her family will be coming to the compound Thursday and will spend Friday here. On Saturday, they are going out of town with Rita and Steve and their kids, Hayden and Reggie, for a week. Harry will love it as he gets along with their kids – in fact, I think I saw on Facebook where Reggie says she’s either married to Harry or is going to be. Who can keep up with these crazy kids these days? So I am trying to think of something to entertain the family on Friday. I grabbed my neighborhood newspaper and found only two events on Friday. And they are:

At 10:30am, nursing moms will gather at more than 20 sites around Portland, with their babies, of course, and they will all begin nursing. That sounds delightful! No specific places are designated, so how will these moms know where to go? They expect at least 1,000 women will turn up at the venues which include supermarkets, restaurants and similar places. There will be refreshments, other than the obvious one, and goody bags and even prize drawings. This event is being held to coincide with World Breastfeeding Week which began in Canada in 2001 and has since spread all over the world. They do give a website you can contact and presumably they will give directions. I’m thinking we’ll give that one a pass.

And then I found one other event that surprised me. It talks about the owners of Jim and Patty’s Coffee on Northeast Fremont Street. For a minute I wondered if my brother and I had opened a coffee house and I had forgotten! But then I read on and realized it wasn’t talking about my brother and me. Jim and Patty are hosting a sing-a-long and ice cream social. Proceeds from ice cream sundaes are going to Our Mother’s House, a downtown drop-in center for prostitutes and those in the sex trade. I know our mother would be proud if Jim and I were doing something like that, but it’s not to be. I just read that it’s on Saturday, and Teri and family will be gone then. So I guess we’ll just have to come up with something on our own.

The above picture is of Teri and family getting ready to leave the compound for home after a stay with me. That was taken a few years ago and everyone is older now sad to say.

I just had a brilliant thought . . . at least I think it is. If the static kill where they dump mud and cement down on the top of the oil pipe that’s leaking works and kills it, could it possibly work the same on Julian Assange of WikiLeaks? It’s sure worth a try!