I'm A Patsy - Gotta Problem With That?

Wednesday, May 28, 2008


John McCain’s fund raiser with George Bush

Tuesday night, John McCain had a fund raiser in Phoenix, Arizona, with George Bush. However, he didn’t want to be seen with Bush in those circumstances – he wants to put a little “distance” between Bush and himself – so they held the fund raiser at a private residence for republican, rich people only. McCain has to use Bush in that the republicans have all the money and Bush is in charge of it. No journalists or photographers were allowed – just rich republicans. It’s sure different from Obama who had over 70,000 people at a fund raiser on the grass by the Willamette River in Portland, Oregon, or Hillary having open meetings with students at colleges all over the country – no one was excluded at those.

The above photo just came into my hands, and I’m thinking it might be a secret photo taken at the McCain/Bush fund raiser! There was nothing written on it, so I have no way of knowing for sure, but it certainly fits the profile of a “down home” type of get-together with everyone congregating in the kitchen like they used to do when McCain was young. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves, and apparently raised around three million dollars. Not bad for a little get-together.

Monday, May 26, 2008

News I find very interesting

A woman in Oregon was placed on five years’ probation after being convicted of embezzlement while she worked as a bookkeeper at Langdon Farms Golf Club. She stole $233,000 which was originally intended to stock the ATMs at the golf course clubhouse. She blames it on Mirapex she was taking at the time for Restless Leg Syndrome. I’ve written about that drug before and it’s side effects which include compulsive behavior such as gambling, shopping and increased libido. Apparently she was spending much time at a casino about 60 miles away. I’m wondering why this took so long for them to find out what sort of bookkeeping she was doing. Didn’t anyone else ever check the books? I sure hope my ATM is managed a little better than that one was. Do they now have an opening for a new bookkeeper and will they make sure she’s not on Mirapex?

I read in “The Oregonian” that the “Pasties Lady” – Jennifer Moss -- has moved from Ojai, California, to Ashland, Oregon. She lived in Ojai for a year and would ride her bicycle around town in a hemp G-string and flower-shaped pasties. This was done to promote earth-friendliness. I don’t quite get the connection between earth-friendliness and riding around on a bike nearly naked, but then I’ve never tried it. Maybe she knows something we don’t know. She was arrested many times in Ojai for obstructing traffic. I think the last time she was arrested was when she removed everything but her G-string and pasties in front of people leaving Mass outside a Catholic church. She moved from Ojai because she said the people there weren’t conscious enough about the air, soil and water. And she was helping them become more conscious? She found out that Ashland has no laws that prohibit public nudity, so she celebrated her arrival by stripping off all of her clothes and doing a headstand right outside the police station. After that, she hopped on her bike and rode naked through the city. I think Ashland will be a good fit for her with all the arty people who live there and the Shakespeare Festival. She couldn’t have picked a better home.

I recently heard of a man who took Jet Blue on a cross-country flight. I think he was on standby, but managed to get on and then sit in a jump seat reserved for the flight staff. However, a couple hours into the flight, he was informed they needed that seat for their crew and he would have to go to the lavatory and remain there for the rest of the flight which he did. He was quite upset as I can imagine. I can empathize with him as I flew Jet Blue to New York and back to Portland several weeks ago. The planes were great, the seats were very comfortable, I loved the television and they seemed to have more snacks than what I was used to. But I decided to use the lavatory during the flight and made my way back to it. I went in and was reaching for a paper seat cover when we hit some turbulence and I fell onto the seat. No seat cover, but I didn’t care by that time. I did my thing while the plane was bumping around, but when I tried to wash my hands, I couldn’t get the water turned on because of all the bumping. So I sat back down on the toilet to wait it out when all of a sudden, during some big turbulence, the cupboard over the sink flew open and feminine hygiene products went flying into the sink, onto the floor and every place! I just sat amidst all the mess, and when things quieted down a little, I lurched back to my seat where I remained for the rest of the flight. When you need a toilet, there’s no place like home.

Monday, May 19, 2008


As I mentioned in my previous posting, Cindy and I visited Teri and her family in Manhattan last week. They live on the 39th floor of a big building directly across the street from the New York Stock Exchange. It was almost overwhelming to arrive at her place which was surrounded by huge buildings like the Exchange and other Wall Street establishments. I think I expected to see her bigger, as if to fit into her surroundings. But she was still the slim, little girl I’ve always loved . . . not that I wouldn’t have still loved her if she were now bigger. It was so much fun to be with both of my daughters at the same time which rarely happens, and Teri and Mark were very good to us.

There is a huge deck on the 7th floor of the building, and we could sit out there and look at the Exchange and all the other official buildings in that area. I had no idea what they all were. One afternoon Cindy and I went down to the deck and she went to the edge and waved at all the people in the building directly across from her. She said one man waved back while she was frantically gesticulating. She said she wished she knew sign language so she could have told him to come over and sweep her off her feet like they do in the movies. Where is Marlee Matlin when you need her?

We went to the theater twice which was a real treat. We saw “Sunday in the Park with George” which had beautiful music and singing. We also saw “The New Century” by Paul Rudnick which was hilarious but also touching in parts. After that one, we had dinner reservations at 10:30pm so we had to get moving. Mark spotted a cab down the street and ran to it and jumped in the front seat. Teri, Cindy and I hurried along behind, but I stubbed my toe on something and started falling to the left. I moved as if in slow motion, with my arms flailing all over the place as I was trying to regain my balance. But I just kept going down, down, down . . . and then splat! I hit the sidewalk on my left side. I was on the ground for only a second because some big man was behind me, and he scooped me right up and set me down on my feet. I didn’t even get a chance to thank him as he disappeared so fast. All I know is he was big and dressed in black. I wondered who that masked man was, and why he didn’t stay and get to know me. I actually don’t think he was wearing a mask, but it’s possible since I never saw his face. The world needs more men like that -- men who will lift us up and set us back on our feet. That sounds like a good campaign slogan, doesn’t it?

I had told Teri before I went that I didn’t want to do subways anymore. But taking cabs was hard sometimes and cost money, so one night when we were going to Lincoln Center for the theater, I gave in and agreed to the subway. I hate going underground that far and then climbing back up again, but it’s sure faster and cheaper than any other mode of transportation. Mark kept telling me I had to get off the subway fast and not linger at all. I’ve watched enough Seinfeld to know what to do and what not to do on subways. I’ve learned many things from the Seinfeld show. I don’t think Mark watches Seinfeld like I do – in fact, I don’t think anyone does. I’ve learned it’s not a good idea to take off all your clothes as you sit there, and there is never really enough time to try and get off and get a snack before the train takes off again.

My driver back to JFK when I came home was originally from Pakistan. He was very friendly and interesting and talked about his family back home and here in America. He told me that his people – Muslims - revere and love their mothers. The two most important things for them are Muhammad and their mothers. The mother part sounded great to me, but I wasn’t sure about Muhammad as I know nothing about him. We arrived at the airport and he kept on talking about how beautiful the farms were in Pakistan and how life is not as frantic as it is here. He was going back soon to visit his family. By the time I finally got out of the car, I was almost ready to buy a ticket to Pakistan and see all those calm, happy people on the farms. But I thought better of it and just came home.

The picture, starting from the left, is of me, Donna (a friend of Teri’s), Donna’s two daughters – Lily and Phoebe – Harry, Teri and Cindy. Teri, Cindy and I are wearing the official necklace of the I Eta Pi (Betty Broderick) sorority which a street vendor just happened to be selling. He must have known we’d be in town. Meredith Baxter never showed up. Donna is not yet a member as she still has to go through initiation . . . whatever that may be.

Sunday, May 11, 2008


New York!! New York!!

Cindy and I visited Teri and her family- Mark and Harry - last week in Manhattan. I’ll be writing about our visit in my next posting, but now I’m going to write about Willy and Harry. Willy is their dog and a very sweet dog he is. Harry is almost 13 but seems sometimes to be around 20. But then don’t most 20 year-old guys act about 12 most of the time? Harry has changed so much in the past few years that it’s hard to imagine him when he was young. If I lived closer I’d see the age progression, but I just see it in spurts a couple of times a year. I don’t see that much change in Willy. He’s still the same, sweet dog he always was.

Teri lives on the 39th floor of a big condo building directly across from the New York Stock Exchange. Normal people can’t walk on that block in front of it ever since 9/11 which changed so many things there and everywhere. They have security check points and NYPD all over the place, guarding our stocks or something like that. So that’s where Willy has to go poop which is not too good. But Teri takes him down the elevator early every morning and walks him around and he poops in front of the Exchange. I think a lot of us would like to take a dump on the Stock Exchange right about now.

I could never take Willy for a walk as he’s too strong for me to hold on his leash. So I would watch him go to the front door every day about 4pm, waiting for someone to come home and walk him. He’d stare at me and I’d spend much time apologizing to him for just sitting there and not helping him. Now I think Teri has hired someone to walk him at noon which will be nice for him and all the people having lunch at the tables on the sidewalk right across from the Exchange. I wish I could be there.

I spent time with Willy on the couch and on my bed. I also spent time with their four cats which are all different in their own way. The cats were all over the place. They were in Cindy’s and my bedroom on the bed, in the suitcases and in all the sacks of stuff we had, and they were also on the kitchen counters when I was trying to fix a piece of toast. It wasn’t safe to ever turn your back on them! I came home covered in dog and cat hair but I didn’t mind a bit. That’s the way it used to be all the time when I had pets. My box turtles didn’t shed, but I can’t get any turtles now or bullfrog tadpoles as it’s against the law or something. Whatever happened to the good old days when you could have box turtles and bull frogs? Those were the good times.

The last night of my visit, Harry, Willy and I watched L&O: SVU on my bed. That’s something we share. I think Willy slept through it. Harry is a lot like me in some ways much to the consternation of his dad. Several years ago, I introduced Harry to the wonders of spam. I didn’t get a chance to fix him any while I was there, but next time for sure. It was good to spend some time with him to make sure I’ve left my mark on him in some way. I think I have, and I love him a lot. In the above pictures, Willy is waiting by the door at 4pm and the other one is of Willy and Harry on the couch.

Thursday, May 01, 2008


When my brother, Jim, and I were young and lived on the farm, we raised rabbits for a 4-H club to which we belonged. My dad was an orchardist and raised apples, pears and cherries to be shipped all over the country. But we raised some animals which gave us eggs, meat and milk for our own use. We named many of the animals and loved them all. I liked taking care of the rabbits - we fed them, cleaned their hutches, played with them and when 4-H was over, we ate them. That was how life on the farm was.

My dad had a white, fur muff made for me out of the fur of Alexander, our big buck. It was beautiful and kept my hands nice and warm when I tucked them into it in the cold weather. I still have it in my hope chest with other special things. I don’t know what I was hoping for with the hope chest – at that time, maybe it was for a big chest! I’ve proudly shown it – the fur muff, not my chest - to Teri and Cindy, but they don’t really like hearing about it. They’ve always lived in the city and we never ate our pets. But the way the economy is right now with the sky-rocketing price of food, maybe I should get a few chickens and put them on my condo deck. I could sell the eggs and also eat the chickens after a while. I wonder what the condo association thinks of chickens on decks. “Chickens on decks” . . . sounds like an entrée at KFC, doesn’t it? I’ll have to check it out.