"Falling for Clooney" - a rooster, not George

The Happy Egg Company in Britain hired Catherine Alliott, a well-known romance novelist, to write a Chicklit romance novel for chickens. Jean Paul Michalski, a grower of free range chickens, believes playing the audiobook for the chickens when they come home to roost has a soothing effect on egg-laying hens. When they are calm, they lay more quality eggs. At least that's his idea. Alliott's voice is soft and soothing which appeals to the chickens. I don't know if they understand the content of the story, but if they lay more eggs of better quality, who cares? The chicken farmers will love it! I don't know just how the story goes as there's just one rooster, Clooney, and many hens. So the hens will all be scratching and pecking to get Clooney's attention. I still would rather listen to "What does the Fox say?" but I don't know if that would make anyone produce any eggs, but that song does make me laugh and be happy which is better than laying eggs in my case. Alliott has many animals on her farm and many chickens, so she knows what she's doing. It will be interesting to see if there becomes a glut of eggs on the market after a while.

As a little girl, we had chickens and a chicken coop on our farm. I would go out and gather the eggs sometimes from their nests in the coop. I wonder if we had had access to the Chiklit audiobook at that time, we may have had bigger and better eggs. When Teri and Cindy were young, I bought a young duck and goose and we named them Bonnie and Clyde. We kept them in the backyard, and they grew up big and mean - the goose was mean. They also ate the fish in my fish pond, so we took them to a pond somewhere else. I would like to have had chickens, but it wasn't possible where we lived.

I tried to find a picture of me holding one of our chickens when I was little, but the scrapbook of those years is falling apart so I came up with nothing. So this picture is of Teri and Cindy holding Bonnie and Clyde, our duck and goose, years ago. It looks like Cindy is choking Clyde - that could be possible. 

What Does the Fox Say?

I think the fox says "Thamsanqa Jantjie," the character who did the signing for Obama at the Mandela memorial the other day. I don't think anyone could pronounce that name except possibly the foxes.

Jantjie is a schizophrenic who at times becomes violent and was actually hallucinating while he was signing. This by his own admission. He says he tried to control himself and not let on what was happening to him. He signs all over the place and no one seems able to do anything about it. He makes no sense and doesn't use facial expressions that signers use. He is a complete fraud and I can't understand how he even got into the event. They supposedly had very tight security what with many of the heads of state being in attendance. How can something like that happen? Why hasn't this joker been arrested or put someplace where he can get treatment for his schizophrenia(there isn't any) and at least not be able to get violent among people. I laughed when I saw him on TV, but it's really quite serious. I laugh just thinking about how he was waving his hands around and looking so serious! Things like that make me laugh which I need. I think the foxes could say his name - I can't say it and it took me about 15 times to type it correctly!

This picture is of Teri at her little piano. I thought she was trying to play but since nothing developed, I think she was signing! She probably could have had a great career signing for dignitaries and important people who needed it, but I don't think we gave her enough encouragement. What I mean is, we didn't know a thing about signing so just let her go on with the piano which she didn't do either. Not a shining moment for us as parents.

Air flight can be interesting and fun . . . and sometimes horrible!

I've been reading about Elan Gale, who says he's a Los Angeles TV producer. He found that his flight to Phoenix on Thanksgiving day was being delayed. Also on the plane was a middle-age woman, Diane, who was quite vocal regarding the delay. She said her family was very important to to her and they had a special recipe for stuffing and she needed to be there to help - it was crucial. Gale said she was wearing mom jeans! So they began tweeting each other and it got quite nasty. He first sent her a glass of wine saying, "Hopefully if you drink it, you won't be able to use your mouth to talk. Love Elan." And so the tweeting began. One tweet from Elan said " . . . Next time you're in a bad mood, stay home. I hate you very much. Eat my d***. Love, Elan." So Diane tweets that she will speak to the authorities about him when they land. He tweets back, "Dear Diane, When you speak to the authorities, please make sure they arrest you for cannibalism because you just ate my d***! Love, Elan."

There was more silliness that went on, but when they departed the plane, Diane walked up to him at the gate and slapped him in the face! He said he laughed and said he didn't want her detained but he did have one last tweet for her which was, "Diane, allow me to introduce myself. I am The YearOfElan. Look me up online. Read every tweet. Read every response And maybe next time you'll be nice to people who are just trying to help. PS - Eat my d***. Love, Elan." What the hell is the Year of Elan? Who is this turkey anyway?

Nice Thanksgiving story! I don't think I'll ever have Elan produce anything I want produced. He's too much of a loose cannon. And I hope Diane's stuffing got along without her. I left mine in the oven so no one even ate it!

I had a couple bad experiences in planes. One was when I was waiting to board and there was a fat guy sitting near me with horrible BO! I didn't want him getting on my plane so I kept close watch on everything going on around me. I even followed him as he meandered around. Finally I boarded and he wasn't there! Maybe it turned out he was on the "no fly" list for stinky people and they caught him at the gate.

Another time I was visiting Teri and family in New York and became sick with the flu - really sick. I fell off the toilet and Mark carried me to the bedroom. I had a high fever and they finally decided I should see a doctor at the hospital right down the street. Harry, their son, was about a year old and also sick. It was a steep street and I couldn't walk, so Teri got me in the baby stroller and pushed me down the hill. I think it was raining at the time. We were quite a sight!

I didn't get any medicine so she pushed me back up the hill. I don't know how she did it. She was wonderful. They finally got me on a plane for home and my girlfriend and husband were meeting me at the airport with a wheelchair. I was out of it on the plane and couldn't even talk - my voice was gone. But I had to go to the bathroom and managed to stagger up the aisle and open the door. When I got in I didn't do all the things you're supposed to do on strange toilet seats such as crouching over it to pee, lining seat with paper - stuff like that. I figure if you can afford a plane ticket you can afford to get rid of crabs and other contagious diseases so I didn't worry. Actually, I didn't give a shit by that time. I fell on the seat and put my head down between my knees and was probably going to sleep. All of a sudden the door banged open and I heard a man say, "Oh, I'm so sorry." I said, "I don't care." He slipped away and I stayed there for a while. I finally got back to my seat and into Portland. My friend was there with a wheelchair and they got me to the car and home. I was at the doctor's office the next day with almost pneumonia.

I think my experience was worse than Elan's. He could have been a little classier and kept his mouth shut and not been the douchebag he turned out to be.