Last week was sort of anti-climactic compared to the previous week. The week before, I had been glued to the TV watching news reports on the election process – which state was leaning toward which candidate and by how much and on and on and on. Each channel had its own projection format, and it got to the point where I became sick of the whole business. And yet I kept watching and watching . . . and watching. Finally it was over, and I was ecstatic with the outcome along with nearly everyone else. I thought “Thank God, now I can watch my old programs.” So I spent time watching “30 Rock,” “Fringe,” and the Rachel Maddow show among many others. I had watched Tina Fey do her “Sarah Palin” bit on SNL, and she was hysterical! She was more Palin than Palin. I don’t think she can ever give that up.

So last week I settled down to my old routine, but much to my surprise, it looked like the Republicans were getting ready for 2012 . . . or was it just that Sarah Palin was getting ready? I saw her on every channel that has been discovered. She was always cooking in her beautiful kitchen in Wasilla with news crews all around her. One time she was cooking moose chili – yuck! Another time she was stuffing cheese in split hot dogs which she then put into the oven. All the time she was talking about the fuss over her wardrobe and how some of the clothes were now in “the belly of the plane.” Now which plane is that and where is it? When asked if she would run in 2012, she said that was in God’s hands. She said if there’s a door and God says to go through it, she will plow through, even if it’s cracked. She doesn’t listen to all the bloggers who are probably in their pajamas and writing in their parents’ basements. I do write in my pajamas, but not in my parents’ basement. I have my own place now without a basement. I didn’t like her remark one little bit. The First Dude, I mean Todd, gave one newshound a ride on his snowmachine. Sarah made it very clear that it’s a snowmachine, not a snowmobile. Who cares? Maybe that’s important in her little circle of friends in Wasilla, but who the hell cares what it’s called down here? Todd was holding Trig during all this chatter in the kitchen. I had learned that Trig’s name is Trig Paxson Van Palin. Do you suppose Sarah had a crush on Eddie Van Halen when Trig was conceived?

Finally, by Friday, I thought that would be all over, but it wasn’t. I was watching “Entertainment Tonight” like I do occasionally – actually I do every night. It showed Sarah at the Republican get-together in Miami where she spoke, but I don’t think anyone there really cared. She apparently isn’t the most-loved person in that group. But then it showed Sarah, sunning herself by the pool at her Miami hotel. She was dressed in a pink T-shirt and really, really short Nike shorts. The sexy librarian façade was gone and it was just hot babe by the pool!

I decided to go for a short walk to get away from the Palin news. Upon my return, I turned on the television as I usually do. The first thing I heard and saw written on the screen was a man’s deep voice saying, “Have you planned your funeral?” I ripped off my coat and immediately sat down and started making plans. Did that man know something I didn’t know? And then I remembered I had already told my daughters I didn’t want a funeral and to just scatter my ashes in front of a movie theater. But I guess that’s up to them as they are the ones who will be doing it, as I’ll just be dead and won’t really give a damn anymore!

Finally, I sat down to read my latest “Time” magazine. I read an article by Joel Stein on his problem with finding a name for his future son. I usually like his articles as they are funny, but he is a little full of himself at times. I couldn’t understand what his problem was with naming the kid. Just pick a name and that’s it. But he was talking to everyone and getting advice from people he didn’t even know, and he said that people who didn’t do that were stupid. Well, I guess I’m stupid. When my oldest daughter was born, we named her Teri after the actress Terry Moore. And I didn’t ask readers of “Time” magazine for their advice either.