One day last week -- the only day it wasn’t raining this month -- the weather was gorgeous, so I decided to take the bus downtown and buy some cosmetics to try and make myself look more relevant or appropriate with the times. I don’t know if that’s the right wording, but it’ll do. I ended up getting eye shadow to try and make my eyes stand out more. My ophthalmologist always tells me as soon as I walk into his office that I have the most deep-set eyes he’s ever seen. I keep thinking pretty soon I’ll be able to see out of the back of my head. I want to look presentable next month when Cindy and I go to New York to visit Teri, so this was the reason for my shopping. I got some eye makeup and left the store to head home. But that was just the beginning of my journey.

I was getting very hungry, so I stopped at a drug store on my way that always has skuzzy-looking people in front making drug connections. At least that’s what I hear they’re doing, but if they’re not, they look like they should be. I bought two York peppermint patties – I absolutely love them - and went outside and leaned up against the wall on the corner to eat one of them. Since I was then a captive audience, a couple men came up to me waving clipboards they wanted me to sign. But I declined as I haven’t signed anything since my divorce papers. I decided I’d better get moving, so I ventured on, eating the second peppermint patty as I walked. On one corner, a woman stepped up and said, “Jesus loves you.” I thanked her and moved along. I walked by many flowers, now in bloom, in huge pots on the sidewalks. They were colorful and beautiful and made my trip downtown all the more special. And then on another corner was a man holding a big cardboard sign with large letters on it that read, “Cunning Linguist.” When I looked at it, I started laughing out loud. The man said that most people just look at it in a puzzled manner, apparently not getting the drift. But I did. I think he appreciated that but would have appreciated it more if I’d given him some money. But I was in a hurry to get to the bus, so I moved on. When I arrived at my bus stop, there was a fat man sitting on the bench, shouting things about Jesus, how we should find Jesus, how we should love Jesus . . . blah, blah, blah. He wasn’t just talking, he was shouting! I wasn’t opposed to the content of his ranting, but it wasn’t the proper venue for his oration. I finally went up to him and tried to tell him to quiet down, but he waved me away and kept on shouting, even louder now. I walked down the block and he eventually shut up.

My bus finally showed up, and I got on and joined the others for the ride home. I sometimes think it would be fun for someone to write about each person on a certain bus . . . where they’re from, what they do for a living, are they married, do they have kids, do they go to church, are they democrats (I certainly hope so), have they ever committed a crime, do they cheat on their mates, would they like to cheat on their mates but are too afraid? If everyone were honest in his/her answers, it would be quite a book. But I doubt that anyone will ever attempt it. I know I wouldn’t answer any questions if I were approached. So there you go – not a very good idea. I find my trips downtown are very interesting and refreshing as I see so many different types of people in a very short time. I should do it more often.