FACEBOOK for OFs

Recently “Time” magazine named Mark Zuckerberg as Person of the Year for 2010. At 26 years of age, that’s not too bad! When he was a sophomore at Harvard and 19 years old, he started from his dorm room what was called “Thefacebook.com.” As “Time” states, it was billed as “an online directory that connects people through social networks at colleges.” He eventually dropped the “the” from the title and now has 550 million members. He soon dropped out of Harvard as he had something else going then! In the movie “The Social Network,” there were many circumstances in it that didn’t really do Mark justice. He didn’t start FACEBOOK to get girls; he already had a girlfriend. He didn’t do it for the money as that doesn’t matter that much to him. He’s a regular guy and not pretentious at all. He just thought it would bring people together and even find new friends and old friends.

After reading the article, I wondered why he couldn’t go a step further and do one for the old farts and maybe name it “FACEBOOK for OFs.” I think there might be a great interest in the 60+ group. Now the readers and members, for the most part, are younger and talking about their kids, jobs, sex, travel, etc. I think the older group might talk about where to find the best plastic surgeons; who gives the best botox; what exercises are good for what parts of the body; is organic food just a big fake; is sex good after 90 and is it even possible; do I look as old as I feel; do you feel as old as you look; did you cry when NBC took the original “Law&Order” off the air; did you smile when you found there’s now a new one on BBC from the UK; what you take for erectile dysfunction and does it work; what happens if your ED medicine makes you erect more than 4 hours; do you still have orgasms and just what exactly are they. I could go on and on about things to talk about. But for me, I go on FACEBOOK but mostly just read what others write. I very seldom say anything. Maybe I have nothing interesting to say, or maybe it’s because I’d probably write something controversial as I’m prone to do, and then in the morning when I turned on my computer there would be 25 messages waiting for me.

I’m thinking there might be a lot of commingling between the two FACEBOOK pages. Wouldn’t young women looking for sugar daddies go to the OF page to search for wealthy, older men? And wouldn’t cougars go to the original FACEBOOK and entice young men with money and sex? Eventually, the two would meld into one huge FACEBOOK and the whole thing would implode! Now that sounds really exciting!!

“Traffic Light” – new Fox show

This show is premiering on Tuesday, February 8 at 9:30 PM on Fox. I just watched it and found it hilarious! It’s about three guys in their 20s at different stages in their romantic lives. Mike (David Denman) is married to Lisa and has a young son. He’s found he now has no time just for himself, so he spends time just sitting in his car watching movies and thinking Lisa doesn’t know what he’s doing. But she does.

Adam (Nelson Franklin) has just moved in with his girlfriend and finds it’s a lot different than just having her “stop over” once in a while. She’s always there. Now they have to figure out just how to make things work.

Ethan (Kris Marshall) is always single and doesn’t date one woman for more than about 3 weeks as that would mean something he’s not ready to realize.

In the pilot episode they spend much time in their cars, talking to one another. They would all be on together which was funny in itself. They could talk about their wives, girlfriends and all sorts of problems, just the three of them together. Twice Mike was pulled over by a big, black policewoman while driving. He told the other two guys to be quiet, but they kept butting in while he talked to the policewoman. She was very funny and ended up giving them relationship advice.

I’m thinking this must have been written by young guys who have been in these situations and are putting it down on paper. If they come up with enough of the crazy things that were in the pilot, this should be a hit. I’ll be watching!

“Human Target”

I just watched the first two episodes – “A Problem with Maria” and “Communication Breakdown” - of this show which will be airing on January 5, 8-10PM. This show recently added two more characters to the group – Ames (Janet Montgomery) and Ilsa (Indira Varma).When women, especially the pretty, sexy kind, are added to a show it seems to bring more vitality and excitement to the proceedings.

In the first hour episode, Maria, an old flame of Chance’s, appears in a bar where another woman is putting a move on Chance. I can’t imagine any woman in a bar or any place else, for that matter, not putting a move on Chance if she had a chance. She needs his help in finding a kidnapped South American dictator. His group doesn’t want to, but will do it for Chance. Ilsa tries to keep the men in control since she’s the boss, but she never quite pulls it off. Ames helps out a lot, but it’s hard controlling her as she’s always been in trouble. But she’s very smart and cute which doesn't hurt. Ilsa and Chance are in a plane crash while looking for the South American and manage to escape their followers.

Back at the ranch, Winston (Chi McBride), Guerrero, and Ames meet Tony Hale, an inept private detective who has gotten himself in trouble and is being chased by about a dozen killers. He’s an old acquaintance of Chance’s, so they feel like they should help him. Hale was in “Arrested Development” and was an absolute riot in that. But the guys and Ames get into a big mess and barely get away with their lives.

Both episodes went so fast I can’t remember what happened when, but I liked it! This show seems to have improved with time. There seems to be more dialogue between the three men which is oftentimes quite humorous which I like. I especially like more from Guerrero. I hope this keeps up. Watch it!

Again? Is it really time for Christmas again?

Time seems to be going faster and faster. I think it has something to do with global warming or something on that order. I looked for a Christmas picture and decided this one was good as it’s what means a lot to me. I think it was taken at a 1999 Christmas celebration at Cindy’s house when we were younger with shorter hair. I love my daughters so much and enjoy the time that I can spend with them. We all live in different places, so it takes quite a bit of preparation for us to be together. When I have cancer – that usually does it – or even a pacemaker. But I can’t do that all the time, so we have to rely on other reasons to get together. Christmas is always a good time, but it doesn’t work out very often. This year Cindy’s family is coming down from Washington to spend it with me and Teri will be in Brooklyn where she lives. But Cindy and I will have our time together where we’ll talk about Teri, and when that wears out we’ll move on to other people.

When the three of us are together we have a ball. We sit on my deck and drink wine and talk about everybody. We’ve made a lot of decisions on my deck . . . some that were very good and some after too much wine that I can’t remember. We also started our Betty Broderick sorority and elected ourselves as the only officers. Diane became a member and I think Cindy recruited some from her Brownie Morrison store in Tacoma. She has a lot of gay guys and drug addicts who come in and are very friendly and talkative. One comes in and always promises to bring his husband. I think he has a couple times, but doubt that they buy anything. I’m sure many of them are also members. The more the merrier is our motto . . . or one of our mottos. Cindy is bringing April, her bull mastiff, who is huge! She goes to the shop with Cindy every day and has to be with her all the time – she adores her and Cindy feels the same about April. So Cindy and I probably won’t have any time alone to have a meeting of any kind. April will be drooling all over us if we sit down for too long. Doesn’t every family have someone who drools a lot?

So, Teri, we’ll miss you more than I can say, but I hope your Christmas with Harry and Mark is a good one. And I also hope that no one at your celebration drools on you.

Merry Christmas!!!

“Bob’s Burgers” – a new Fox show premiering January 9, 8:30 – 9PM

I just watched a preview episode and found it hilarious! This is an animated comedy, and I don’t usually go for animation when I look for something to watch. But this one was hysterical. Bob Belcher (H. Jon Benjamin) runs the restaurant that has been in the family for three generations. His wife Linda (John Roberts) helps along with their three kids – the middle child is Gene (Eugene Mirman), the eldest daughter is Tina (Dan Mintz) and the youngest child is Louise (Kristen Schaal). They are having their grand re-re-opening, and Tina will work the grill, Louise will staff the counter and Gene will push samples in the streets.

But the day doesn’t start off well as Tina announces her crotch itches. Bob says it won’t be easy for her working the grill with just one hand – it shows her scratching with the other hand. Gene doesn’t do too well on the street. He has a fart machine which he uses and also keeps dropping the samples. Unbeknownst to the rest of the family, Louise has told during show and tell at school that their restaurant uses human remains from the crematorium next door in their burgers. She did that because she wanted to outdo someone else’s story. That sets off a big fuss and the health inspectors pay them a visit. That day their sign reads, “Burger of the Day - Child Molester – Comes with Candy.” One man in the restaurant looks suspicious, so Bob tells Gene to wait on him as he won’t molest Gene because he’s fat. Tina tells one inspector about her rash, but he won’t look at it. This all goes on and on and is very funny!

When it ends, it turns out their meat is 100% grade A beef with no human remains. Tina tells everyone she thinks her crotch itch is cured as it now smells like bacon. What a relief! This is a weird, crazy little show and it makes me laugh. I like that kind of show.

Christmas is coming!

It’s time to do all the things that normal people do for Christmas. The first thing I found in my “It’s Not That Much Fun Doing Normal Stuff” book was baking cookies. So I pulled out my yellow bowl I got at my wedding shower 500 years ago, and started in with the cookies. I was whistling “Jingle Bells” as I sifted flour into the yellow bowl. But much to my surprise, my sifter broke into a million pieces right into the flour! I quit whistling and started swearing. That went on for a while until I realized that something had to be done. I didn’t have enough flour to start over again, so I dumped all the damaged flour into a sieve and shook it back into the cookie makings. I got all of the metal pieces of the sifter out of the way, and started all over again. But I definitely need a new sifter – the sieve isn’t really modern enough and takes quite a bit of time. I think the sifter was from my wedding shower 500 years ago also. Things just don’t last, do they?

After the cookies were done, I had to go to the store and also stop at the pet store and liquor store. I got some bird seed for my little birds on my deck and also for the squirrel that appears every day. I throw a milk carton at him, but he never learns. He just comes back for more. From there I went to the liquor store for some vodka as I’m having friends over for Bloody Marys. I don’t buy liquor very much as I drink cheap wine. But I asked the clerk to help me. She pointed to the very expensive bottles way up on the top shelf – I decided those were for the very tall. On the middle shelf were the mid-priced bottles that I recognized. Then she pointed to the bottom shelf where the really inexpensive bottles were. I couldn’t bend over that far to read them, so I picked one from the middle row. I wonder if there are many little people living around here who can find the bottles on the bottom shelf without any trouble. I’ve lived here for quite a while and have never seen any little people.

After doing all that, I looked in my book again and it mentioned bathrooms and toilets – pointing out that they should be clean when company stops by. But what if you have “drop in” company that you don’t expect? What it means is that your toilets should be clean ALL THE TIME! What a drag. So I got busy and washed the bathroom floors and cleaned the toilets. But the company isn’t coming for over a week so that means I’ll have to keep on doing it until they come. And then can I stop? I wish I had never looked at that book and started doing all those things. I could have just watched re-runs of Law&Order all day instead of the other stuff I did. I hope I got all the metal parts out of the flour – guess we’ll find out when the company comes.

In the picture, I’m baking cookies in the yellow bowl with Reggie, Harry and Hayden. This was several years ago – Hayden is now in college. Reggie and Hayden are Rita’s kids and Harry is Teri’s. I guess Harry is giving instructions . . . probably wants to lick the spoon. I always lick the spoon but no one ever sees me. I do it before the cookies are even done. I guess that’s why I never seem to have as many cookies as I should have!

“The Good Guys”

The season finale of this show is entitled “Partners” and is on Friday, 12/10 at 9PM on Fox. It begins like they all do with Jack and Dan starting out on a little case that doesn’t require a lot of fire power. It has something to do with someone dining and dashing out of a diner. But Jack’s old partner, George Gluck (sounds like a smart one) who is now assistant chief of the department, shows up after Liz’s (assistant DA) informant about a mafia kingpin is murdered. Apparently there is a dirty cop involved behind the hit which puts everyone at the station in peril. This episode shows us that to survive, we must stay close to the ones we trust. Since the show is “Partners” I would assume that means Jack and Dan depend upon each other . . . not some character who was a long-ago partner named Gluck – who would even want a partner with that name?

I love this show. It seems like Jack and Dan are always given little insignificant crimes to solve and yet always end up solving the really big ones. When it started, Jack would get very upset with Dan and his laziness, drinking and womanizing on the job. But he grew to understand Dan and finally resigned himself to his ways and even grew to admire and like him. All the characters have been brought out more as time has gone on, so it’s more like a family now in the station house and we know where everyone stands. So be sure and watch this one Friday night. I’ll be waiting for it to come back.

GLEE and “Raising Hope”

I already wrote about “Raising Hope” but will mention it again. It’s on Tuesday, 12/7 at 9PM on Fox. This one is more of the crazy antics of one family consisting of MawMaw, the dementia-addled senior who lives with her granddaughter, Virginia (Martha Plimpton), and her husband, Burt (Garret Dillahunt). Their son, Jimmy (Lucas Neff), also lives there with his little baby daughter. Jimmy got the baby’s mother pregnant when she leaped into his car one day when she was running from the cops, and they had a little something that went on. They didn’t know each other – it was just one of those things! She was out of the picture immediately when she was picked up for murder and eventually executed. But Jimmy felt like he should care for the baby which the family eventually named Hope. MawMaw is played by Cloris Leachman who is from another planet or seems that way!

This Christmas episode is very funny as they all have been. I hope you all watch. You won’t be disappointed.

GLEE is another good one this week. GLEE is going world-wide and known probably every place imaginable. They’re touring in England and Ireland in June and July of this year. Everyone wants to see them and everyone wants to be on the show. I don’t think they can do much wrong. Last week’s GLEE was so good. It had the cast members singing and dancing, and some were taking lead singing parts that before hadn’t been. I liked that as more people were shining. Kurt was singing with “The Warblers” from Dalton Academy where he transferred after bearing so much harassment at McKinley High for being gay and in the glee club. The Warblers did a number at Sectionals, “Hey Soul Sister,” that I thought was fantastic. Kurt seems happy there as he’s accepted and I think already may have a friend. So it was a very good episode.

This week the GLEE members find out that Brittany (Heather Morris) still believes in Santa Claus. She always plays the ditzy blonde who says crazy things that make her seem even dumber! The club goes to a mall and Brittany engages in conversations with Santa’s elves. Heather says, “It’s my Christmas gift. The episode’s such a good message for younger teens who take Christmas for granted.” I think this is going to be another good one for GLEE. So don’t forget to watch!! It’s on Tuesday, 12/7 at 8PM on Fox.

“Raising Hope” from Fox

The Christmas show entitled “Toy Story” airs Tuesday, December 7 at 9 pm. I just watched the episode and it’s hilarious as the others have been. The family’s church – yes, I guess they do go to church – always has a nativity scene, and Jimmy’s mom is determined to have little Hope in it as the baby Jesus. The uptight director of the pageant doesn’t want Hope because Hope’s mother was a murderer and was executed in prison. During church services, the minister gives the tithing pledge which is, “I upped my pledge – up yours.” Jimmy and his mom enlist Jimmy’s sort of girlfriend to be in the nativity scene. She’s quite excited and says it will be like “camping with Jesus.” Jimmy’s mom is determined to get Hope into the scene no matter what anyone says.

The whole episode is about a certain type of doll that sneezes and snot runs out of her nose. Everyone wants it and they’re in short supply. But everything works out and Hope gets to be the baby Jesus and Jimmy’s mom the Virgin Mary. The entire show is full of craziness, jumping from one hilarious scene to another. That family started out as extremely dysfunctional – and they actually still are – but in a good way. They’re all making an effort to provide a good home for Hope. Whether or not that ever happens, they’ll keep working at it. They mean well, and I think it will be interesting and fun to watch them making strides in the right direction, even if they do get off course now and then.

This one is a very fun episode . . . but then, they all are.